Saturday, 12 June 2010

The F Word

I am a nice man. I do not use the F word. It is very common to use it nowadays. It is on the television all the time. It was even used on the Today Programme on Radio 4 this week. Everyone around me uses the F word. It is impossible to have a conversation without the F word coming up. Even at church the F word has featured. It is, simply, inescapable.

I am, of course, talking about football. The whole nation seems to be obsessed with the World Cup Tournament. I am happy that people are interested in sport. I like the Wimbledon Tennis fortnight. I am ok with it being on the television a bit, as long as there is something else to watch. But I do not want football to dominate the news. Sport is not news. I do not want features about football players in my newspapers. I would like a can of coke. I would not like a world cup can of coke. I need to visit the supermarket. I would not like to visit the Official England World Cup Supermarket. I occasionally buy beer. I do not need 36 cans of it. I do not buy pizza at the supermarket. I do not want an England flag. The unbearable hype is almost as bad as Christmas. If England win (as unlikely as ever) life here will not be worth living. I shall be cheering for Germany, Argentina, or whoever is needed to defeat England.

To football fans – enjoy the football. But please, do not talk about it all the time. I am not interested.

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